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My New Column: Giving Thanks For ... Juncos!

My Wild Turducken Recipe for Thanksgiving

TurduckenBy popular demand, here's my recipe for free-range Turducken, which is especially cherished this time of year. I believe it is gluten-free. (Illustration by Miwa Couweleers. Thanks, Miwa!)

Roast  Turducken


1 Wild Turducken, plucked (12-16 pounds)

7 common taters

2 snake eyes, diced

4 Jersey tomatoes, drawn and quartered

3 cups extra-moist water

½ cup balsamic undressing

1 grain of salt


Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Catch Turducken.